Unconventional hobby; unconventional looks
It was 2 am, and while others around her were fast asleep, Clara Tan, a 22-year-old, who’s studying for a degree in Game Design, was just beginning her transformation. She softly placed the three trusty makeup palettes that she’d had for years, making sure not to wake her parents up. Picking up her brush, she swiped it onto the product and brushed it onto her face. You could tell where her brush touched because, with each swipe, it left a pale white streak on her face.
Not quite the usual time a person would be putting on make-up, also her “make-up” isn’t quite what most people would envision. Growing up, Clara was often told, “You need to be proper and present yourself a certain way!” When she was older in junior college, her friends would say, “It’s weird for you to dress up!” As a result, Clara often found herself hiding what she did from her friends and parents… at first.
You see, Clara has a bunch of hobbies that individually would not be so suspicious. She loves sewing, painting and crafting, in general. But Clara has another hobby that perfectly encapsulates all her favourite things that any regular person might find a little kooky – cosplay.
Clara got introduced to the hobby when she followed one of her seniors in secondary school to a convention. There, her eyes opened up to a whole new world! She was in awe the entire time with the intricate costumes, stunning makeup, and everyone was just having fun. It basically became her “Roman empire”, “Ever since then I was like…” she pauses dramatically and continues, “Wait, I want to dress up too,” says Clara giggling in between her words.
Being an introvert, Clara did not have many friends to share her love for the hobby. When TikTok rolled around though, she thought it would be the perfect opportunity to share her cosplay and makeup looks with like-minded individuals on the platform. However, Clara quickly realised that she didn’t like it. When asked why, she stated that cosplaying is dressing up as existing characters that require a certain look and behaviour and that it was more fun for her to do whatever she wanted, so she started cosplaying original characters, which she dreamt of.
Clara’s characters would take the forms of her favourite things at the moment. It could be anything she was obsessed with, from something as simple as cheese to a more intricate thought like the seven deadly sins. She would take the time to think of how she could personify them and what she would need for the outfit, makeup, and event the accessories.
Clara then places her brush down, her face completely white from the initial layer of makeup. She then picks up a much smaller brush, dabs on the colour black on the palette and brushes it onto the lids of her eyes first and then a little on her nose.
The seemingly sweet-looking girl was slowly turning into a clown, quite literally. Some people would call it her “alter-ego” but Clara says it’s more of an extension of her personality, “I like it when I don’t look like myself. It’s like drawing on paper but it’s my face and that’s my favourite part,” Clara says grinning widely.
While others find clowns and the genre of horror terrifying, Clara gets inspired by them. “I'm very inspired by clown imagery but I also like horror games, horror movies. I think part of my interest in clowns is probably also from there.” She explains how she found comfort in the dark and how it allowed her to be anything she wanted to be, from a spooky butterfly to more child-like clowns.
She also appreciates how her “inspirations” don’t outwardly express gender and truly allow her to be anything she wants. “I don’t strive to be more feminine or more masculine, so I think that's part of something that I like a lot,” says Clara.
This unconventional take on cosplaying has also led to others noticing her looks and resonating with her characters. Clara had, on some accounts, bumped into her juniors outside of school and they would excitedly share how she’d inspired them to step out of their bubble.
“It makes me happy knowing that they don’t think I'm weird… who think that this is the coolest thing that I do and because of that they also want to try makeup that isn’t what you would normally see in public.”
She adds: “With the abundance of content online, people are not only more comfortable to do things because other people are doing it, it’s being mirrored. But it also gives younger people ideas on what they could do. Sometimes, you don't know what you can do until you see it happen.”
It is now 4 am, and Clara is almost done, she puts on her frilly outfit and whimsical accessories, made by herself. She is now the clown she initially imagined in her head. She whips out her phone and snaps a few photos of herself before making some TikTok videos for her page, and another character that was once in her mind had finally been brought to life.
Often separating the art from the artist, Clara does not share much of herself online for safety reasons. This often leaves her followers wondering more about her. I asked her what was something she would want to tell her viewers. She took a moment to think and had this to share:
“It's okay to want to do things that are not conventional… and not what will make the most money. Be realistic.” She adds: “It is also not realistic to be in a 9 to 5 that you absolutely hate and that you're just doing because your parents want you to do it.” Clara says puffing her chest out proudly at the words of wisdom she just excitedly shared.
With that, Clara starts packing up all her stuff and wipes all the makeup off her face. She gently folds up her costume, packing it away till another one of her fantastical characters needs it. She glances at her phone, 5 am she saw, just the time to finally slumber and maybe dream up some new characters to bring to life next.
